Sometimes, the wheels just come off. You can be going about your day, living your life, not a care in the world, but one wrong turn, one poor decision, one stroke of bad luck can send your whole life spiralling out of control.
We’ve all been there, but (hopefully, at least) we’ve never had things go as catastrophically off the rails as the hapless protagonists in our ‘Worst Day Ever’ collection. So, if you’re going through a rough patch, cue up this selection and remember – things could be much worse.
Zola
When waitress and part-time exotic dancer Aziah "Zola" King (Taylour Paige) decides to accompany new friend Stefani (Riley Keough) on a road trip from Detroit, Michigan to Tampa, Florida, she figures it’ll be a fun time and a chance to earn big bucks dancing in Floridian strip clubs. Accompanied by Stefani’s dim-witted boyfriend, Derrek (Nicholas Braun) and “roommate” X (Colman Domingo), they hit the Sunshine State, only for things to quickly spiral out of control. It turns out Stefani is a sex worker, X is her pimp, and Zola is expected to participate – with dire consequences if she doesn’t.
Adapting, of all things, a viral Twitter thread by the real life Zola, director and co-writer (along with playwright Jeremy O. Harris) Janicza Bravo takes us on a bizarre odyssey through the neon-stained underbelly of modern America. Sleazy, sordid, and dangerous, this is a pitch-black comedy that sets out to shock.
Killer Joe
The late William Friedkin (The Exorcist, The French Connection) offers up a deep-fried slice of Southern noir adapted by Tracy Letts from his own play.
Desperate to clear a drug debt, trailer trash delinquent Chris (Emile Hirsch) hits upon the idea of having his mother murdered for her life insurance, knowing the money will go to his mentally disabled sister, Dottie (Juno Temple). Enter “Killer” Joe Cooper (Matthew McConaughey) – corrupt cop and part time hitman. Chris and his co-conspirator father (Thomas Haden Church) can’t front the down-payment that Joe demands, but the charismatic murderer has taken a shine to Dottie, so he’s more than happy to take her instead. Of course, things don’t go according to plan…
Hugely controversial upon release thanks to its violence and troubling sexual politics, Killer Joe’s NC-17 rating kept it from box office success, but it marks a late career return to form for the iconoclastic Friedkin, who revels in its lurid atmosphere and sweaty Texas setting. Fascinating and repellent in equal measure, and featuring a queasily magnetic turn from McConaughey, it’s as bleak a noir as you’re ever likely to see.
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Killer Joe
Crime drama • thriller • 2011
Crime drama • thriller • 2011
Climax
Argentinian provocateur Gaspar Noé, who previously gave is Irréversible and Enter the Void (now those are some bad days) once again takes us to the extremes of human experience with this experimental psychological horror.
Unwinding after a hard day’s rehearsal, a dance troupe led by choreographer Selva (Sofia Boutella) slowly come to realise that the sangria they’ve been sipping has been spiked with a powerful hallucinogen. Paranoia and violence reign as the dancers turn on each other, not knowing who among them added the extra ingredient.
Working with a cast consisting of professional dancers with little to no acting experience (only Boutella and Souheila Yacoub had prior screen credits) and employing an improvisational style rather than working from a traditional script, Noé guides us on an atavistic descent into primal horror, stripping away the thin veneer of civilisation to reveal the animalistic urges that sleep in every human heart.
The Wicker Man
Now 50 years old, the Grand Matriarch of Folk Horror has lost none of her power to shock.
Adapting the obscure 1967 novel Ritual by David Pinner, screenwriter Anthony Shaffer and director Robin Hardy take us on a trip to the remote Scottish island of Summerisle with devout Christian cop Neil Howie (Edward Woodward), who is investigating the disappearance of a young girl. Once there – and isolated from modern civilisation – Howie discovers to his disgust that the islanders, led by Lord Summerisle (Christopher Lee in a career-best performance) have embraced an odd form of paganism. And we proceed from there…
Every horror fan knows and loves The Wicker Man, but we’ll avoid spoilers for the uninitiated. Lauded as “the Citizen Kane of horror movies”, half a century has not dulled The Wicker Man’s power to shock and disturb one iota.
Train to Busan
If we’re being honest, the venerable zombie apocalypse subgenre was getting a bit creaky when Korean director Yeon Sang-ho hit us with this blistering, breakneck take on the model codified by the late George A. Romero way back in 1968 with Night of the Living Dead.
The premise is simple: when a zombie plague hits South Korea, a mixed bag of passengers on a high-speed train from Seoul to Busan must fight for survival. But it’s not what you do, it’s the way that you do it, and Train to Busan is packed with visceral horror, thrilling action set pieces, and a top-notch cast, including Squid Game star Gong Yoo as a workaholic dad desperate to save his young daughter and action legend Ma Dong-seok as a two-fisted brawler (play to your strengths, we say).
An American remake by The Night Comes for Us director Timo Tjahjanto is in the works, but don’t sleep on the original.
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Train to Busan
action • horror • 2016
action • horror • 2016
Murder on the Orient Express
No, not the recent Kenneth Branagh luvvie love-in, but the 1974 adaptation of Agatha Christie’s superb 1934 mystery by director Sidney Lumet and screenwriter Paul Dehn (with uncredited assistance from The Wicker Man scribe Anthony Shaffer).
Albert Finney is detective Hercule Poirot, who finds himself tasked with solving a seemingly impossible murder on the eponymous train. Luxurious production design and an all-star cast, including Lauren Bacall, Martin Balsam, Ingrid Bergman, Jacqueline Bisset, Jean-Pierre Cassel, Sean Connery, John Gielgud, Wendy Hiller, Anthony Perkins, Vanessa Redgrave, Rachel Roberts, Richard Widmark, and Michael York, make this one unmissable.
We’d say they don’t make ‘em like this anymore, except they literally did. Nonetheless, Murder on the Orient Express is an unparalleled example of sumptuous ‘70s blockbuster cinema.
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Murder on the Orient Express
mystery • 1974
mystery • 1974
Murder Party
Director Jeremy Saulnier first came to wide attention with his revenge thriller deconstruction Blue Ruin and the gnarly punks-vis-skinheads survival horror Green Room, but his microbudget first feature shows all the stylistic hallmarks that would later win him acclaim.
Finding an invitation to a Halloween party in the street, lonely nerd Christopher (Chris Sharp) decides to attend, throwing together a homemade costume and heading off to the address, an abandoned warehouse. Once there, he quickly discovers that the other attendants, including Stacy Rock, Paul Goldblatt, William Lacey, and frequent Saulnier collaborator Macon Blair, are planning a murder as part of an elaborate art project – and he’s the object of the exercise.
Reminiscent of the sleazy underground shockers that came boiling out of the New York indie scene of the ‘70s, Murder Party is a stellar example of the DIY creativity-over-cash ethos.
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Murder Party
comedy • thriller • 2022
comedy • thriller • 2022
Prom Night
Jamie Lee Curtis may be an Oscar winner now, but she started out in low budget horror movies. Certainly, Halloween is the one everybody knows, but this 1980 Canucksploitation slasher is another jewel in the scream queen’s crown.
Curtis is Kim, one of a standard-issue set of horny teens who find themselves targeted by a sadistic serial killer on – when else – prom night, the highlight of the high school calendar. Could it have something to with the accidental death of Kim’s younger sister years ago? Could it be the work of school principal Mr Hammond (Leslie Nielsen, one of the few familiar faces here)? Could it all just be an excuse for a number of gory kill scenes?
Well, yes, of course, but that’s the charm. Prom Night is a meat ‘n’ potatoes exploitation shocker that knows its job and sets out to do it with maximum impact. It doesn’t rewrite the rulebook, but it’s not trying to, instead serving up a steady stream of death and sex to an eager audience.
