American actress Mindy Kaling gave the commencement speech at Dartmouth University over the weekend. Equal parts hilarious and practical, it was like a manifesto for modern women, all while taking a shot at US President Donald Trump.
A 2001 alumna of the Ivy League college, Kaling, 38, shared with graduates the importance of self-confidence. “I’ll tell you my secret, the one thing that keeps me going, my superpower: delusion,” she said. “This is something I may share with our president a fact that is both horrifying and interesting. Two years in, I think we can pretty safely say that he’s not getting carved onto Mount Rushmore; but damn if that isn’t a testament to how far you can get just by believing you’re the smartest, most successful person in the world."
Addressing the crowd at an Ivy League university, one of the most privileged institutions in America, the creator and star of The Mindy Project, did not hold back in commenting on the lack of representation for women of colour in Hollywood.
“I should actually probably clarify who I am for the parents and grandparents in the audience who are thinking to themselves, “Who is this loud Indian woman? Is that the girl from Quantico? She looks so much worse in person,” she said. “No, no, I’m not Priyanka Chopra, not even Padma Lakshmi. I’m the other Indian woman we have allowed to be on television, Mindy Kaling.”
Kaling seems to be comfortable breaking social conventions, and spoke to the crowd about how her life changed after she gave birth to her daughter Katherine in December 2017 and the challenges of life as a single parent.
“I remember bringing her home and being in my house with her for the first time and thinking, ‘Huh. According to movies and TV, this is traditionally the time when my mother and spouse are supposed to be here, sharing this experience with me.’ And I looked around, and I had neither. And for a moment, it was kind of scary. Like, ‘Can I do this by myself?’” she said. “The reality is, I’m not doing it by myself. I’m surrounded by family and friends who love and support me.”
Kaling's uplifting speech was ultimately a lesson for anyone experiencing self-doubt. “I was not someone who should have the life I have now, and yet I do,” she said. “I was sitting in the chair you are literally sitting in right now and I just whispered, “Why not me?” And I kept whispering it for seventeen years…”
Her tips for college graduates are ones we can all live by. Print these out and stick them on your fridge:
1. First off, remove “Proficient at Word” from your resume. That is ridiculous. You’re really scraping the bottom of the barrel of competency there. This is how you become proficient at Word: You open Word on your computer.
2. Most of your post-college life is simply filling out forms. Car insurance, health insurance, W-2s. W-4s, 1099s. Guess what? None of us know what any of those forms mean, but you will fill out a hundred of them before you die.
3. You never need more than one pancake. Trust me on this. Cartoons have trained us to want a giant stack of those bad boys, but order one first and then just see how you feel later.
4. This one is just for guys: When you go on dates, act as if every woman you’re talking to is a reporter for an online publication that you are scared of. One shouldn’t need the threat of public exposure and scorn to treat women well; but if that’s what it’s gonna take, fine. Date like everyone’s watching, because we are.
5. And this might be the most important—buy a toilet plunger. Trust me on this. Don’t wait until you need a plunger to buy a plunger.
