Key Points
- Rachel Maxine Anderson is a Filipino-Australian writer and director.
- Among her films so far, Rachel Maxine Anderson feels she was at her most vulnerable in 'Bananas'.
- She is currently working on 'Ina', a series focused on a daytime producer who casts her Filipino mother as the host of a new cooking show.
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'I'm reclaiming the Filipino part of myself’: Fil-Aus director embraces her heritage through films
SBS Filipino
15/03/202414:22
"Vulnerability is scary. I feel it right now talking to you. I know this is weird, but my laptop is propped up by this wooden box...I looked at it and I thought, 'This looks like the box that holds my dad's ashes.'"
For Director Rachel Maxine Anderson, she feels the most vulnerable when she shares stories in life and in film.
Rachel Maxine Anderson Credit: Supplied
‘My life with the Filipino community melted away’
Born of a Filipino mum and an Australian dad, Anderson shared that she grew up around a large Filipino community in Hervey Bay, QLD.
"I remember going to El Shaddai with my mom on Sundays and spending a lot of time with other Fil-Aus kids.
"I've actually been reflecting on my childhood in the past year or so. I realised that at the age of eight, my life around that community melted away."
Wanting to assimilate, Anderson admitted that her mum stopped bringing her to church and the kids she used to play with became "distant figures".
I began learning who to become from Dolly magazine instead of from my mum.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
"Now that I'm in my early 30s, I feel the urge to reclaim the Filipino part of myself. I now question: 'Is it about me relearning something I forgot or something that I never really knew in the first place?'
"A friend of mine said to me recently that being biracial is not about being 50% Australian and being 50% Filipino. I can be 100% both, and I am reconnecting with the Filipino side of me now."
‘You can’t avoid what’s living in your skin’
Anderson admitted that she is now leaning into that once-forgotten part of herself through her films.
"It's just always swimming somewhere in me. It's literally part of my DNA.
There's no avoiding something that lives within your skin, and I'm letting the Filipino side of myself take up some space creatively.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
The first project Anderson undertook to further explore her Filipino identity was '.
"I created the series with Mary Duong and it was all about us spending time with our mothers and reconnecting with our cultural identities.
"Ever since that time in my life, I just kept on wanting to tell stories like that. The projects that I work on now are within that space."
One such project in the space of reclaiming culture and identity is 'Ina', a six-episode online series that follows a young daytime producer who has no choice but to cast her estranged Filipino mother as the star of her new cooking show.
"The two characters are forced to better understand all the reasons why they were first driven apart before they can ultimately find a way back to each other."
'I grieved him prematurely'
While Anderson is finding her way back to her mum's roots, she also contends with the grief of losing her father.
"I lost my dad a few years ago. It felt like the rug was pulled underneath me; but I think I was grieving him prematurely for so long because he was older.
I realised once I could do the maths that I would probably lose him in my twenties. And I did.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
Doing maths and realising the limited time she had with her father, has only made wanting to understand her mother more urgent.
"I've still got my mum, but I now think about what it would mean when she's not here. I think in the past years, wanting that connection has felt more important and more urgent.
Losing my dad made me realise that there's not enough time.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
Anderson shared that 'Bananas' was released during the last year of her dad's life and knowing that the end was near gave the film an even deeper meaning.
"There's an outtake of Bananas where mum and I were looking at each other in the middle of a conversation about something else and we both burst into tears. It was a strong, unacknowledged grief.
Perhaps in that piece, I didn't touch on that grief enough or say it enough; but it was hard. It was premature grief for an approaching loss.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
"My dad passed away two weeks after the show came out. The last conversation we had was after he watched it. He told me he was proud of me.
Writing from a scar
"I remember a friend saying to me that you should write from a scar and not from a wound and I think that that's where I'm at now," she shared.
Anderson admitted that she can no longer think of change and creative work without thinking about therapy and connection.
Vulnerability is scary, but I'm not scared of it. It's necessary.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
"For me, therapy and film are opportunities to reread pages of my life, and to understand my own narrative and how events have shaped who I am and where I'm headed."
Not only have therapy and film helped Anderson grieve the loss of her father and celebrate the rediscovery of her Filipino roots, they have also helped her connect more with her mum.
You know, my mum would never put up her hand and be like, 'Hey, everybody listen to me. This is who I am. This is my story.' I want to do that for her.Rachel Maxine Anderson, Director
"This whole process of getting to know my mum, it's also helped me get to know myself."
